The environment has been front of mind the last few days. It's mostly because the June editions of the major women's monthlies are starting to appear. And as is usual, one or two roll out token 'Green' issues (probably printed on an endangered forest, coated with extra toxic chemicals so the pages are glossy enough to make the slave labour clothing look pretty on its pages) to time with World Environment Day on June 5.
One editor is honest enough to admit the inherent contradictions of a fashion magazine doing a green issue... before presenting us with two generic-looking fashion shoots in America. Clearly the snow and sky in this part of the world weren't generic looking enough, so it was deemed good for the green issue to burn shitloads of carbon by flying a fashion team to the other side of the world to shoot 12 pages. I'll hop off my soapbox now because hypocrisy runs far and wide, but just saying that is all.
Oh yeah, back to diets. It's not often pointed out that a healthy diet is also one that is environmentally friendly. Here's why:
Over-reliance on any one type of crop/fish/meat isn't the key to sustainability - so eating a range of fresh foods (ie a balanced diet) is good for the planet, as well as your bikini plans.
Processed foods require, well, processing. Adding salt, trans fats, sugar, colourings, flavourings and artificial sweeteners takes lots of fuel to run factories. Putting newly flavoured food in pretty packaging uses more carbon and natural resources. Taking processed food from packages and putting it in your mouth puts dimples on your thighs and jelly on your belly.
As the anti-Atkins brigade and the Queen of Carbs I'm happy to announce that a high protein diet is an environmental no-no. According to The Vegetarians*, nasty cows and sheep produce nasty methane which is creating a nasty big whole in the ozone layer and killing us all. On top of that it seems those who grow cows are 'Wallys with Water' - taking the prize for the biggest water users in the country.
(*The Vegetarians - a bit like Scientologists, just not as well funded and in the case of Andrew G with worse hair. And before you think I'm one of their kind let me share my favourite vegetarian anecdote: a vegetarian friend trying to tell me the reason I was well-endowed and she wasn't was because I ate lots of hormone-filled chicken during puberty and she didn't. Of course I promptly told her (and her leather shoes) that all Australian chicken is hormone-free, and has been since the 1960s, before explaining how it is chicken fillets can really turn Flattie Fran into Hootie McBoob.
Once again, I digress. So how to be a Goddess in a bikini AND an environmental crusader:
- Eat widely, choosing a range of foods, including meats, fish, chicken, legumes, fruit, vegtables and grains.
- Eat as close to nature as possible – if the nutrition label reads like a pharmacy then it's not natural. In fact, having a label in the first place is a good indication of human interference level.
- Walk everywhere you need to go. Cars = carbon emissions. Foot power = buns of steel and killer calves.
- And lastly, you could try eating lots of chicken. I hear it can give you massive cans.
Posted by Busty St Clair
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